It's okay to want more

The unthinkable happened and you found yourself living the worst case scenario. Your spouse passed and in exchange for their physical presence was profound grief. You eventually got back to functioning, but it’s surreal; a bit like living someone else’s life.

You wonder if this is all there is.

You want to feel like you’re living again, not merely existing.

And yet, you hold onto grief as if it is the one and only connection to your person.

I often thought, “If I’m not miserable, then I didn’t love him enough.”

It took years for me to realize that it simply isn’t true.

Here is what is true:

Grief is only a part of our connection to our spouse. Only one part. There are many others. For example:

Laughter is a connection to our spouse.

The little victories of assembling, repairing, and maintaining – are a connection to our spouse.

The good memories are a connection to our spouse.

Finding new meaning and purpose is a connection to your spouse.

Creating a life that is full and happy and beautiful is a connection to our spouse.

The second worst case scenario is existing without ever living.  

It’s okay to want more. Wanting more for yourself is a way to honor your spouse. Even if wanting more means companionship or a relationship. You can want that, too.

If you want more but feel stuck, I know how to help you. My coaching program called Life Reconstructed is exclusively for widowed people. Simply click below to learn more.